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'I have a naked picture of you on my phone' | Once you send it, you don't have control over where it goes

Dr. Melissa Sporn shares real-life story about sexting and advises how to teach your teens not to do it

MCLEAN, Va. — A woman in her 20's was at a bar and caught the eye of a man who noticed her. She was interested and began chatting with him. Suddenly, he said something that brought her back to a difficult time in her life. 

"I have a naked picture of you on my phone," he said. She knew exactly what he was talking about.  In high school, the woman had sent a naked picture of herself to a boy and he shared on a website. The case led to charges and a trial. She moved on, hoping to leave the past behind. But the image continues to live its own life, refusing to fade away. 

Dr. Melissa Sporn, a clinical psychologist shared the true story of a person she knows, to shed light on the growing problem of sexting.  

RELATED: 4 high school students under investigation for sharing naked photos on Snapchat

The Journal of the American Medical Association (JAMA) has recently found that 25% of teens between the ages of 11 and 18 have received a sext (sexually explicit image or video sent via electronics)  and 15% have sent one. 

Who do they send these pictures to?  15 percent send to people they've never met, 70 percent sent to a boyfriend or girlfriend. They send them because they think they're sexy, funny or are pressured into doing so, says Sporn. 

But sending a nude photo of someone else or even yourself, can be considered a felony--child pornography.   

In Fairfax County, four teenagers are under investigation for sharing pictures of naked juveniles on Snapchat. 

Credit: Peggy Fox

So how do we teach our teenagers not to sext?  

Sporn says parents must have conversations (not just one!) as soon as they give their children a cell phone.  Explains these points:

  • Images have a life of their own
  • Sexting can result in a criminal record
  • Your dignity is worth protecting
  •  Think before you send

Your teen should consider these questions before sexting:

  • Is this how I want people to see me?
  • Could my significant other use this to hurt me?
  • Would I be upset if this was shared with others?
  • What is the worst thing that might happen if I share this?

Help your teenager focus on what a healthy relationship is. Discuss what it looks like and how you should treat each other.  

Modeling responsible behavior is also important. Sporn says parents should not share pictures of their children on social media without asking them. Talk and social media--what appropriate and what's not---again and again.  

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