SUITLAND, Md. (WUSA) - "I totally understand what she was going through," said Yvette Cade, the day after Hearther McGuire was fatally shot and pushed out of her van on Connecticut Avenue by her estranged husband.

Cade sees parallels between her life andMcGuire's. Like McGuire, Cade tried to keep her husband away by filing a protective order.

"She took all the stepsfor getting help. But thatprotective order is just a piece of paper,"said Cade.

In Cade's case, Judge Richard Palumbo lifted the protective order against her estranged husband, Roger Hargrave, three weeks before Hargrave's2005 attack at her workplace. Hargrave was caught on surveillance video pouringa plastic bottle full of gasoline on her. He then her set her on fire.

Burned over 60 percent of her body, Cade barely survived. The physical injuries have weakened her immune system, and she struggles with anxiety, PTSD and constant fears of fire.


Cade'sdaughter, who was 12 at the time, is now 19 and the mother of baby twin boys. The babies bring Cade enormous joy. Children of domestic violence are her main priority in every speaking engagement.

She believes children who witness violence at home, may become perpetrators themselves, if they're not taught how to have healthy relationships.

Surprisingly, Cade has compassion for the perpetrators. She does think the judge should have sent the estranged husband, Philip Gilberti, in the Rockville case to jail becauseit would have givenHeather McGuire time to flee to safety, and it might provided time for family intervention with Gilberti.

"They need the support of families too. Families need to tell them to stop acting that this and stop being a perpetrator," said Cade.